Tuesday, October 28, 2008
A ray of hope
My son just called me, from his cellphone. He said that he's decided to stay at his treatment center for one more day. He also wanted me to know that he's come up with a gameplan:
He believes that he should move to Oregon, where his dad plans to move in four weeks.
What a relief!
Those of us who love B (and there are many of us) have always felt that this is what he should do. But, wait...there's more.
Recently, I mentioned to B's dad, that he should take B with him to Oregon. B's dad has been living here and commuting to Oregon (where his wife lives) for about 7 years. Yes, it's "different". But, it is what it is. His dad's quick response was "that's not an option". I won't get into why his dad feels this way, because it is not for me to tell him what to do. All I can say is that I would hope he would realize that he has a chance to help my son to help himself.
I was relieved to hear B say that he realizes that he cannot come back to his hometown-- where I live. It's sad, but it's true.
I did not tell B that his father doesn't sound like he's willing to do this. Instead, I told him that I found how to order the drug tests, online. I told B that I would buy the drug tests (they're only about $5.00 a piece) and that he could use this as a negotiation with his dad.
I had spoken with B's dad, this morning, because I was concerned that my son was so quiet and I had not heard from him for three days. I can tell that B's father is wounded. So, am I. I do not wish my son's situation on my worst enemy. While I consider myself to be one of the luckier parents (we have insurance, so he can be admitted into an excellent treatment center), and my son has no arrest records...is not shooting drugs into his veins, is not living on the streets, is not a thief... but, he is still an addict. I also know that if my son does not want to get control of his addiction, he could end up in dire straits.
I do believe that B wants to stay clean. At least he knows that it is dangerous for him to return back to his home turf.
He also mentioned that he saw the man who runs the Sober Living Environment, just a few miles from his treatment center. B had moved in there last May but stayed for two months. That's where he met his roommate that did not work out (another story). He started to tell me that there's a room available but he jumped to another subject. So, I started to tell him some positive things, and then we were cut off. I am guessing that he had to hang up, since he's smuggled his cellphone with him-- which is kinda silly, since the treatment center has a phone that patients are allowed to use, freely. Or, it could be that his battery died.
I feel a little bit better-- hearing B admit that he has a problem, and that he cannot be where I live. Of course, that is followed with sorrow that he might move far away from me.
Still, I am feeling hopeful. I can only pray that his father will make it possible for B to move to Oregon with him.
God has been so merciful. I will wait, I will pray and I will seek God's will.
He believes that he should move to Oregon, where his dad plans to move in four weeks.
What a relief!
Those of us who love B (and there are many of us) have always felt that this is what he should do. But, wait...there's more.
Recently, I mentioned to B's dad, that he should take B with him to Oregon. B's dad has been living here and commuting to Oregon (where his wife lives) for about 7 years. Yes, it's "different". But, it is what it is. His dad's quick response was "that's not an option". I won't get into why his dad feels this way, because it is not for me to tell him what to do. All I can say is that I would hope he would realize that he has a chance to help my son to help himself.
I was relieved to hear B say that he realizes that he cannot come back to his hometown-- where I live. It's sad, but it's true.
I did not tell B that his father doesn't sound like he's willing to do this. Instead, I told him that I found how to order the drug tests, online. I told B that I would buy the drug tests (they're only about $5.00 a piece) and that he could use this as a negotiation with his dad.
I had spoken with B's dad, this morning, because I was concerned that my son was so quiet and I had not heard from him for three days. I can tell that B's father is wounded. So, am I. I do not wish my son's situation on my worst enemy. While I consider myself to be one of the luckier parents (we have insurance, so he can be admitted into an excellent treatment center), and my son has no arrest records...is not shooting drugs into his veins, is not living on the streets, is not a thief... but, he is still an addict. I also know that if my son does not want to get control of his addiction, he could end up in dire straits.
I do believe that B wants to stay clean. At least he knows that it is dangerous for him to return back to his home turf.
He also mentioned that he saw the man who runs the Sober Living Environment, just a few miles from his treatment center. B had moved in there last May but stayed for two months. That's where he met his roommate that did not work out (another story). He started to tell me that there's a room available but he jumped to another subject. So, I started to tell him some positive things, and then we were cut off. I am guessing that he had to hang up, since he's smuggled his cellphone with him-- which is kinda silly, since the treatment center has a phone that patients are allowed to use, freely. Or, it could be that his battery died.
I feel a little bit better-- hearing B admit that he has a problem, and that he cannot be where I live. Of course, that is followed with sorrow that he might move far away from me.
Still, I am feeling hopeful. I can only pray that his father will make it possible for B to move to Oregon with him.
God has been so merciful. I will wait, I will pray and I will seek God's will.
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