Thursday, November 26, 2009

A feeling of helplessness and prayer needed

This is not one of my happy thanksgivings at all. My heart isn't into it. Something happened, today. I can't share it, right now. My son's life is unraveling, and my heart is breaking.

I feel a need to just break down and cry-- to cleanse all the bottled up worry and stress from deep within me.

My son's life is is a very deep pit of despair, failures and unhappiness.

There is absolutely nothing I can do. But pray. Hear his tears... and try to find joy in today.

My name is Debby. My son is a drug addict.  I am unraveling myself, today.  I've hit a wall.


Barbara said...

Oh Debby....I am so, very sorry. I care very much about B and am praying for both of you. I don't understand why life is so painful and hard sometimes.

Heather's Mom said...

Debby, praying for you immediately. You're not alone. Know that God loves B as much as you do. And sometimes the tears just need to come out... That's OK.

Annette said...

I'm praying honey. Sometimes thats all we have...but it is one heck of a lot!

Fractalmom said...

{{hugs}} and **prayers**

you did not CAUSE this
you cannot CURE this
you cannot CONTROL this

you must just give it to God and let Him have the burden.

let it go.

Dad and Mom said...

I'm sorry debby, there is nothing you can do but take care of yourself. Be strong and know in your heart we are all behind you.

Mom of Opiate Addict said...

Oh Debby, I am sorry you are going through so much pain right now, I know this pain. Sometimes we just have to cry, scream, whatever it takes to get it out of our system a bit. Please take good care of yourself. I will continue to pray for you and B. God Bless.

Madison said...

"There is absolutely nothing I can do. But pray." That reminds me of the time someone told me, "Whatever you do, don't just pray." Oh, honey, that set off years of wasted action on my part. In the end, the most powerful weapon you have is prayer.

Cynthia Newcomer Daniel said...

Sending hugs and prayers.

Anonymous said...

I so hope to read something different today. As I'm sure you hoped to write.

I have prayers for you and while I cannot completely understand your pain and struggles I am here for you Debby.


Cheri said...


You and B and your family are in our prayers.

God hugs,
Cheri and Wayne

LisaC said...

Let go and let God. That is all you can do...while you pray. You and B are in my thoughts and my prayers.

Midnitefyrfly said...

You can only do what you can do. I wish I had all the right words to say to stop the hurting. Unfortunately pain is a necessary part of human existence.

My wish is for your pain to encourage change, for change to progress into healing, and for you to find comfort and support in this time of need. Thoughts are with you Debby- you are not alone ((((HUGS))))

Anonymous said...

I just began reading your blog this past week and have already learned so much. I too am a mother of a heroin addict. My son left detox the day before Thanksgiving and while I am grateful that he is alive and shared a good meal with me, I am overwhelmed with worry and fear. With no Alanon meeting available until tomorrow I pray day and night. B. and you are in my constant prayers. Thank you for your honesty.